Honesty is what has helped me.... no one knows what happens to you after you die, why not just accept that? there are many uncertainties in life, each move we make is a gamble to some degree and what happens after the curtain falls cannot be verified by any means other than self deceptions.
Faith after all, is but a gamble on a rumor despite the evidences present....
I find I cannot respect a god who demand I lie to myself...if I don't know, why damn me for being honest about it?
JWs and others try to force you to accept a myth, legend, rumor, and cleverly convoluted logic as proof and to make you claim, because of this that you KNOW and are now accountable...
Paul says, by all things of creation we KNOW there is a god and have no excuse.... I say he is full of $#!+ and a con artist, first of all conning himself and then others because he held strong CONvictions.
here is a simple thing...if someone presents their belief as FACT, unless they can tell you a way to verify it yourself which does not involve you using self-hypnosis, like telling yourself something is real when you have no evidence that it is... they are in essence lying to you....
it seems that much confusion, including yours, comes from thinking you should KNOW the answer and cannot find it...when the reality seems that some questions cannot be answered without lies and self deceptions.